Finding Strength in Loss - Prairie Valentine’s Day Part 3 0f 3

 How to Enjoy a Prairie Valentine’s Day

Part 3 - Message of Good and Hope 

By Karilea Rilling Jungel

On memorable days, such as Valentine’s Day or other important holidays, tragedy can strike. How we come to deal with tragedies is one of the gifts that life gives us – and for some people, strength comes from tendering memories so that others may be encouraged, in order to deal with their own setbacks.

Martie Odell-Ingebretsen of California lost a child nearly four decades ago when her young daughter Michelle “got sick with the mumps on Valentine’s Day and was fed aspirin, which led to Reye's syndrome.” Michelle succumbed a few days later. Because of her passing, Martie’s grief is sweetly pungent not only on Michelle’s special days, but also Valentine’s Day. Martie has made a goal of taking the lives, births and losses of every day by making them special with a touch of Michelle in order to pass along the love. Martie worked in a florist shop for several years…and saw moments like this:

The Changing of the Card

Nodding my head, I listen

across the counter

to the catch in her voice.

I don’t know what to say,

she says, when I ask,

my hand poised above the order form

waiting to write her sigh.

A middle aged man jingles his keys

and walks nervously around the shop

looking at the ground

before he orders roses for someone,

someone named Carol or Barbara.

He is stopped cold when I ask,

what would you like to say on the card.

Oh, he was so in love that his cheeks pinked

and eyes glowed.

Photo by Martie Odell-Ingebretsen

Sometimes a flower 

is used as a quick fix 

to get out of the doghouse

back onto the couch

with slippers and dinner tray.

It’s true, flowers say a lot

without a person even writing anything,

but, there is nothing like words,

said out loud,

written,

shouted,

words like, I love you,

or just, love.

Words like, I’m sorry.

What about, you are more beautiful

than this flower?

For quite some time now 

I have had the urge to change

just one word in a message.

No, to be truthful,

I’ve had the urge to change the whole message

just to see

if it would change a life,

but, I haven’t.

Not yet anyway.

© Martie Odell-Ingebretsen, 7-2-2001

But it was this message that brings the meaning of true love home in kind and full form:

“I will start Valentine’s Day like I do every day. Thanking my GOD for his blessings. Our youngest daughter was just in a plane crash and she survived thanks to GOD! I am still very shook up but so grateful. Our family is about as close as it can be so Valentine’s Day is really just another day as we express our love for each other as often as possible.”

Chuck Robb – Salina, Kansas.

Valentine’s Day: A day to show your love – a day to give gifts, but isn’t every day just that? Do your best. But you might want to keep it in your heart every day. If we all did just this…it could very well be that butterfly affect we all hear about during storms.

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